ketchup

yesterday was admittedly a bit grave. two of my good friends here left edinburgh forever, and one of them perhaps my life as well. it was interesting because my friend rachel from iowa, who has actually recently accepted an offer from uva's graduate architecture program and will completely continue to be around come fall, experienced the full sentiment of a last day in this life here. i watched her try to so hard to fight it, and she did fairly well until i ran into her on the street by chance several hours later and she burst into tears. apparently one of her closest friends had been sort of ignoring her and was neglecting to say goodbye to her...i imagine it's quite difficult for people here who invest themselves in sincere relationships with us visitors. perhaps we have an advantage in being able to return to a complete world full of its own range of characters and leave an entire other one behind, intact and sentimentalized, while those here merely have holes poked in their daily activities, holes that are constantly known and keenly felt.
the other exeunt was made by my canadian friend ron, who i am very glad to have met and included in my social life with regularity. he is such a nomad though, always skipping town and making brief camp in tiny countries all over the world...i'm not sure we'll run into each other again. i suppose there is the fortune of electronic correspondence in my young-person's world. i have been so reliant upon it.
and of course, monday marked the five-week point in the countdown. my remaining time seems so inflexible somehow, and so i fear it will make its stealthy way by me, undetected.

to be dutiful: since my last news update, more has changed. my would-be paris companion pete suddenly and mysteriously bailed on the whole trip, citing some undescribed emergency drama with his transatlantic girlfriend, to whom he needs return home asap. it is disappointing of course, but i hope everything is alright for him and i will still find plenty of means for occupation in my trip to paris. i am still staying with this friend brian, who has graciously offered to be my replacement translator/companion, and i am also meant to meet up with my suitemate from first year, annie, who has been studying abroad there for the year and i'm sure is full of goodies and ideas for a grand time in the city. i'll be leaving in the middle of the night a week from today! and afterwards i must return to write my application to this masters program, work my last half-week at the bistro and prepare for my french/spanish adventures and a last night in london.

for the moment there is much to be done, in words through the afternoon and carrying hot meals and wine glasses in the night. until news/reflections next demand this, take care bellos-